


Asshats Attracted to Bright Lights

by arietes



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, alpha kids arent there but theyre mentioned, and dave lives with rose and mom lalonde, idk ive never written anything serious before so sorry if it sucks, trolls are these weird moth monsters i made up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-28
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-09-01 15:24:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16767805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arietes/pseuds/arietes
Summary: Dave recently moved into the Lalonde estate, where there have been sightings of nocturnal monsters that have been said to eat human flesh. Is that true? Dunno bro, never trust the media.





	1. ==> DAVE: venture into the unknown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you were confused before, it's nothing compared to now. You were about to call it a night and head back inside, when a quiet growl comes from a little further in the trees. Your dumbass monkey brain decides to freeze, staring right into the dark. A pair of reflective eyes stare right back.

Right. Those things.  
As of recently, these weird moth-like monsters have been coming from literally nowhere to wreck havock. You personally haven't seen any yet, but the news sure as hell let you see all their gross buggy glory. Okay well, they're decent looking. Just stick antennae and some gross wings on someone's monster oc and you're good to go. Apparently some have quite literally fucking eaten people, like a cannibal or rabid dog decided to go hog-wild.

It's even worse, because according to the news, most sightings have been around wooded areas. Right where you happen to be. Secluded from any other human contact outside of your mother and sister, about 15 minutes out from town. Right in the clutches of nasty moth monsters.

Although you won't tell anyone, you're pretty scared one of them will catch you. After your mom found out what Bro was doing, you moved in with the Lalondes in their forest mansion. It's been quite a change, mostly the fact you went from constant sound to it being quiet enough to hear the stream running under the house at any time.

It's dark, which doesn't help your fears at all. The unknown holds nothing but dead silence, not even the crickets up to their usual tomfuckery. After a quick check of your phone, you realize it's 2am and everyone is asleep. After weighing your options, (try to sleep and have nightmares of being eaten by monsters, or just stay up on your phone and suffer in the morning), you decide to maybe go wake up Rose and have her help you decide what to do. That's when you hear it.

A loud thunk sounds from outside plus what might be some sort of animal growl mixed with a broken cicada. Fuck. You get up, put on some pants, your shades, and sneak out in a pair of Rose's flipflops to go check it out. All of Bro's horror movies taught you not to do that, but fuck him AND his shitty movies.

You use your phone as a flashlight and shine around, trying to see if whatever it was making the noise is hiding in the bushes or something. Just in case something decides to spring out, you have your sword ready to go from your strife deck. You step in something bright and sticky.

A shiny pink fluid is spilled all over the ground from a large circular bottle. Looks like glittery nail polish with a sorta syrupy texture to it, and smells just as sweet. If you were confused before, it's nothing compared to now. You were about to call it a night and head back inside, when a quiet growl comes from a little further in the trees. Your dumbass monkey brain decides to freeze, staring right into the dark. A pair of reflective eyes stare right back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hdhbdhsjsj sorry if this sucks or is short, ive never really written stuff like this?? yeah


	2. ==> DAVE: freak the fuck out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The idea of moth cellphones pop into your mind but quickly fade, because that's dumb and moths have no reasons to have phones in the first place.

You're frozen in place with fear. The growling get louder and louder, although the eyes stay right where they are. You realize you still have your shades on, (honestly, why did you even bring them?) so you quickly take them off and tuck them on your shirt collar to get em out of the way. Now you can sorta see the rest of the animal, which isn't even a fucking animal to begin with. 

Small fluffy antennae stick up, with wings guarding little birdlike legs, and similarly styled arms. If you put it in some baggy clothes and a hat, you might fool someone into thinking it was human. It's fur is slick with blood, coming from a deep gash on it's side. Guess the wildlife got to it first. It growls more as you approach. You hold out your hands, tilting your phone's flashlight so it doesn't burn the poor dude's eyes. 

"Hey, I'm not gonna hurt you or anything. Just want to see what's up with that gnarly bite on you."

The growls quiet down, but don't fully stop. You kneel down, and examine the wound while also keeping an eye out so it doesn't snap at you and cause even more blood to gather than there already is. You touch the bite, and it makes a pained wheezing noise.

"Ouch, sorry. I dont think I can patch you up out here..." you pause and look back at the light to your room. "...Guess I gotta take you back to the house. Fuck, Rose is gonna kill me."

Despite it's protests, you pick it up and carry it back towards the house. You realize upon touch that it's wings arent even real, just a very nicely made cape. You didn't know that these things could sew, which is mildly concerning. What else can they do? The idea of moth cellphones pops into your mind but quickly fades, because that's dumb and moths have no reasons to have phones in the first place.

You make it inside, and set the creature on the couch. You turn the living room light on, hoping nobody wakes up. The first aid kit is convientently nearby, so you return with bandages, needle and thread, a damp washcloth, and hydrogen peroxide. You're not sure it'll need stitches anyway, but better to get it all in one go than have to get up and find it with some weird bug monster is laying on your couch while bleeding out. Fuck, how're you gonna explain the blood stains? Whatever. That's a problem for later.

"Hey, I got some stuff, so mind if I clean up your wound?" 

It seems to understand and let you do your thing. Luckily, you're pretty experienced in treating wounds so this should be a piece of cake. Until you pour the peroxide. The fucker _shouts,_ possibly waking whoever has ears. But nothing happens, and you sigh in relief.

"Don't scream! I don't want to wake anyone up to reveal a giant fucking bug dude dying on our couch!" You whisper angrily. 

The thing glares at you. Can it understand what you say? Fuck, that might actually make things easier to deal with.

You pinch between your eyebrows and sigh again. "Do you know what I'm saying or am I just blabbering garble?"

It nods. Wow, uh, okay you guess.

"Great, so uh, mind telling me what happened to you?" 

You're quickly greeted with a middle finger, which is more amusing than anything because these bugs have a concept of _'fuck you,'_ making you curious about what else they know. Right, stay focused. Still haven't bandaged this fella up yet.

After you're done, you have absolutely no idea what to do next. Do you throw it back outside? Leave it on the couch for your mom to find? Without any idea for the better, you decide to lead it to your room. The couch death stains can be dealt with in the morning. You set a decorative pillow over the spot in case someone decides to give the couch a nice hard stare. Blood? What blood? There never has nor ever will be any blood. Forget it was ever even mentioned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh boy,,, i think im getting sorta better at this.


	3. ==> DAVE: contemplate your life choices

Soon as you're upstairs, the dude scuttles off into your open bedroom door and you hear loud shuffling. If the dude touches your photos you swear to the great holy spirit of Obama that you'll do something that possibly involves swords. You walk in soon after, seeing that all your pillows and blankets are now missing. It fucking stole them, great. Now you'll sleep in the cold of autumn and all that other wintery bullshit. Right under your computer desk it made a nest out of everything, you think you even see a couple of your shirts in there. 

"Dude, what the shit? I need that stuff to sleep." 

He hisses at you in response. Fine, you guess. You walk to your bed and sit down, glaring at him since your shades are still on your shirt. He glares right back and- Wait? When did you start referring to it as 'he?' Next thing you know, you'll give him a name and beg your mom for a new pet. Does he even have a name already? Fuck, do moth creatures have genders? You'd ask but you're not entirely sure that he can respond. Instead, you get out a small notepad and toss it over to the blanket nest.

"Alright, since you stole all my shit, least you can do is answer some questions." you pause. "Can you do that? Writing english I mean."

You receive a nod in response. Neat. You tap your fingers on your knees for a second while you think of a question. "Can you talk?"

Mothman jr. spends a minute writing on the notepad then tears the page off, crumples it up, and throws it at your head, which you dodge. After uncrumpling it, his handwriting is uh. Absolute shit by human standards. You can barely read it. Ahem, it says.... 'SUCK MY BULGE.' You look over at to see a sharp shit-eating grin. Guess he's gonna make this hard. You re-crumple the note and actually manage to bonk him in the head with it.

He flips you off again.

"Dude just answer my fucking questions, it's the least you can do."

You're greeted with another crumpled note, which actually has an entire _list_ of answers, like world's shittiest FAQ. At least it's something.

You give it a quick read.

'KARKAT'S Q&A EXTRAORDINAIRE'

Q: CAN YOU TALK?

A: YES BUT FUCK YOU I'M NOT GOING TO.

Q: WHAT ARE YOU?

A: I DON'T FUCKING KNOW.

Q: WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

A: READ THE FUCKING TITLE.

Q: WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU BEFORE I KIDNAPPED YOU?

A: SOME FUCKING CANINE LUSUS THING MAULED ME. I DON'T KNOW WHERE IT WENT.

Q: WOW YOU LOVE SAYING FUCK.

A: YEAH.

You still have a lot of questions but this'll have to do for now. You think it's maybe around 3am now, which, according to your phone, yep. Do you just.. Go back to bed now? Karkat stole all your blankets and shit so sleeping on just a plain mattress is kinda a no. Not only that but uh, you're still afraid he might attack you? Maybe you'll wait for him to sleep first? Aren't moths nocturnal?

"SSNNNNNNRK."

Never mind, you guess. Dude snores fucking loud, though. If anything, the snoring is what's keeping you awake. And before you know it, you're asleep too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had to ask for help with this chapter because i forgot to like, plan anything plot-wise before i slapped my fingers on the goddamn keyboard.


	4. ==> KARKAT: raid respiteblock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WOWZA,,,, karkat's perspective? amazing.

Today has fucking sucked. Well, at least the most of it has. You lost Terezi, got attacked by a barkbeast lusus, and now you're currently camped out in some.. "Thing's" hive. He (you think?) patched you up and hasn't tried to kill you yet, so, hey, a bonus! You're surprised he isn't terrified of you, seeing how some subjuggulators fucking killed some of whatever he is already. Witnessing that was not fun at all, yet according to your observations they all have the same red blood as you. Which doesn't make you feel any better about the situation, but still! 

As of now, you're curled under his desk with some tshirts and other shit to mask a nest/pile/whatever. Okay uh, yeah, a nest. You really aren't willing to call it a pile. Eesh. He comes back in, throws a notepad at you, and after a little back-and-forth you write down the most basic questions you can think of before throwing it back. And after that, you somehow pass the fuck out. Good job! If it turns out his species _is_ violent or murderous, you just dropped all your defenses in favor of a nap. Good job, Karkat!

When you wake up, the bright asshole sun is shining through the window. Right, went to bed on a flipped schedule. Doesn't stop your eyes from burning though. The uh... 'Guy' is still asleep, so you move as quietly as you can as to not wake him up (which isn't very quiet. You're surprised he isn't waking up.) and exit the block. Maybe you'll find a kitchen because You're Fucking Hungry, but instead you find uh, his lusus? You think. Who is utterly surprised to find you in their hive. Suddenly, a gun is pointed in your face, and if it weren't for the fact you just ducked you would be very much dead now. Before you realize, you're hissing and another bullet is fired.

"How the _FUCK_ did you get in here?!" they yell, not taking their eyes off you. You hear someone (no, multiple people you think) thundering down the stairs, so while they're yelling to 'DON'T COME DOWN,' you promptly get the Fuck Out Of There.

While you're 'escaping,' you hear uh.. Sunglasses guy, yes, that's his name, calling after you and shouting something at his lusus, which you promptly ignore in favor of finding somewhere that doesn't involve having a gun pointed at your head. Suddenly, you're colliding with who you think is Sunglasses guy, but turns out to be a similar looking.. Thing. You have no idea what his species is called, nor do you care.

You get up, and keep running until you're out the door and, oh, ouch, that stings. You forgot it was daytime, since you're typically asleep, or uh, at least in your decently dark hive during these times. You can't see for shit. Nor can you when knocked the fuck out, which happens when the butt of a gun is knocked against your head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmm. what do you guys think mothkat looks like???? im curious :0 also!!! ty for so many kind comments!!!!!!! (p.s, warning for like. violence? there's guns involved and a little blood but i mean. its in the warnings for this so... expect more of that,, maybe) ALSO sorry this is so short but i feel bad for lack of posting


	5. ==> ROSE: Investigate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Local lesbian takes the wheel to do some Prime Sleuthing.

You're laying in bed, cold because you just so happened to have kicked all of your blankets off of yourself and onto the floor. You'll grab them in a second. It's not like your floor is dirty- well, it is- but in terms of knitting supplies, not dirt or the such. The idea of texting Jade or John is rather tempting, although they're probably both still asleep. The two of them, along with their older siblings, Jane and Jake, all moved into the Egbert household together a year or so ago. Much as you love them, instead of spending the weekend with them as they asked, you had decided to stay home. That's too many Harleylishcrockerberts (a mouthful, yes) in one house for you to handle at once. Besides, without you, Dave would probably die whilst trying to make himself food. Not that you don't trust him to handle himself, just.. He's not really used to such living qualities. He's only been using the oven for a few months now. There's been at least three fires during that time. You can still see the flames rising from the pot of boiling water. 

Suddenly, a bang, a bullet, and various other loud noises. No time to message your friends, as you're out your bedroom door and down the stairs. Mother is holding a gun, yelling at Dave not to come over. You can't tell whats going on, so you shove past him and try to see what's going on. Nothing really could've stomped on the surprise of a lifetime you just received. Even if someone had sat down with you, told you word-for-word the following events, you would still be surprised. Who wouldn't when a mothlike creature as you've heard of on the news barrels directly into you? Before you can process the event, its out the door. Well, technically _in_ the door, as the bright sunlight appears to have halted it's path and your mother rushes over, smacking it in the head with her gun. It tumbles ass over backwards and hits the ground with a soft thunk. Crisis averted, yes? 

She's kneeling down next to you, holding your head this way and that to make sure it didn't give you rabies or something of the sort. You assure her you're fine, right as she turns around to yell at Dave not to touch it. He looks suspicious. You narrow your eyes and stand up, ignoring your mother's requests to ensure that you are in fact, not dying from some disease or bite wounds. Walking over, you decide to crouch back down to get a better look. Just in case, knitting needles are in your hands ready to stab at any impromptu attacks. It doesn't look as scary as the ones on the news, however you notice a large bandage on it's midsection. You eye Dave, who seems like he'd rather bail than deal with your sleuthing. 

"Hmm. David? Did you realize this was in our house?" You question him.

He ruffles his hair back and looks anywhere but you, sunglasses abandoned in his room probably. "What? No, of course not. This was the most surprising event of my life. Nothing will ever top this man, not even something like-" you decide to cut him off. You've gathered enough information just by his shitty lying skills. 

"I hope you realize you just told me everything I needed to know by the fact you are physically impossible of telling a decent lie." 

He does fingerguns and an awkward wink at you. Time to focus on the bug again. You turn around to yell at your mother. "Mom? Do you mind if Dave and I give this a good look before you do anything further?" She gives you a weird and confused look, mouthing the words 'no,' but not explicitly saying them. A yes, then.

Mothman jr, as you previously mentioned, doesn't appear to be threatening in the slightest. If anything it looks slightly grumpy during it's, as you might call it, _"nap"_. Much to Dave and your Mother's surprise, you pick it up and sling it over your shoulder like the world's worst Santa Claus. It grumbles and curls in on itself as you dunk it onto the couch, a cushion falling off to reveal a cherry red stain. You glare at Dave. He looks at the floor, pretending to be inspecting the world's most interesting discarded sock. It seems like this isn't the first time your guest got to lay on the couch due to injuries. You doubt that stain will come out at any point, a shame. It was a lovely couch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhhhh! hey there! we're back!! sorry its been like 4 months since i last updated this lmao. again, very short, but i have a bit of a problem doing long chapters haha

**Author's Note:**

> sorry fellas, im very new to writing. i dont know how to like... make this any longer, so,, yeah.


End file.
